VSC Video

One of my fellow St. Louis volunteers just alerted all of us to this VSC video, which has been updated to include pictures from our year! We're mostly toward the end, and there are some real gems here.



It's hard to believe it's been eight months since we all went out separate ways to jobs and schools. We've managed to keep in touch through email, blogs, Facebook stalking, phone calls, and even the occasional visit. As Sr. T would say, "You all have a great community."

Happy Advent!

Can you believe we're past Gaudete Sunday already? Time sure flies when you are writing final papers. Around this time last year, I was preparing to return to Virginia for the first time in over four months. We VSC girls were gathered around our awesome "living simply" Advent wreath, which involved dirt-filled shot glasses. Tennessee Volunteer got an A+ for creativity.

One of new goals for post-VSC life is reading the scriptures from daily Mass. I did that a lot in undergrad. Looking back, my meditations on the daily readings, especially during Advent, are what influenced me toward a service year. I became more and more convinced that social justice is not an optional part of following Christ. Here are a few verses my 2007 self marked down in a journal:


Isaiah 11
But he shall judge the poor with justice,
and decide aright for the land's afflicted.
He shall strike the ruthless with the rod of his mouth,
and with the breath of his lips he shall slay the wicked.
Justice shall be a band around his waist,
and faithfulness a belt upon his hips.

Psalm 146
The LORD God keeps faith forever,
secures justice for the oppressed,
gives food to the hungry.
The LORD sets captives free.

The LORD gives sight ot the blind;
the LORD raises up those who were bowed down;
the LORD loves the just;
the LORD protects strangers.

And of course Mary sums it all up in the Magnificat as Christ's incarnation fulfills these promises:
He has thrown down the rulers from their thrones and has lifted up the lowly. The hungry he has filled with good things; the rich he has sent empty away.

Welcome new VSCs!

It's hard to believe, but a new VSC year has started. The last of my roommates left on Friday, and the new volunteers arrived yesterday. WELCOME! Right now you still barely know one another, and you are probably still confused by all the random artwork and objects around the house. Sr. T will be keeping you busy with orientation and field trips to your service sites. It's a tough week, but an important rite of passage. (Here's what I was feeling this time last year.)
I can't wait to receive the VSC newsletter and hear all about you!

As for me, I have moved yet again, to a lovely little apartment in Delaware. Grad school summer classes started last week. I am again in a community of 8, only this time we are all museum people. We even have not one, but two token males!

I've only been here a short time, but already it feels like home. I remain woefully ignorant about antiques, but have had little trouble getting back into a school schedule. Today I studied (and handled) trade bills from the 1880's, ate lunch in the Enchanted Woods garden, then communed with 1760's Chippendale-style chairs. Can someone pinch me?

"A wild sojourn so I can learn"

"How the Other Half Lives" from the musical Thoroughly Modern Millie helped inspire my blog title. In it, we meet Dorothy, a socialite who wants to try being working-class; and Millie, a small-town girl who wants to find a wealthy husband in the big city. AS they journey into the unknown, the girls become friends.

The VSC was like that, since the 8 of us came from experiences and hometowns all over the country. In many ways, we took a year off from our normal lives and selves. I know that several of my old hobbies and habits went on hiatus.

Now that I am re-connecting with friends back on the East Coast, it does seem like I have been on a trek into the wild somewhere. They really have no idea what I experienced there, but I have returned a year older and, I hope, wiser.

Moving On

Sorry for the lack of posts in the past week. As you may have guessed, I have moved back to the East Coast from St. Louis. I spent a few days visiting relatives in Chicago, and now I have begun the long process of sorting and packing belongings for my move to grad school.

Leaving VSC is very surreal. I may be moving on, but most of my fellow volunteers are still there. The school teachers will be busy with summer school until the end of July. My family and friends may have seen pictures of my co-workers and roommates in STL, but they don't actually know them. They don't really know what the past year has been like. At times I am not even sure if I know myself. As I fall back into the routine of my family's house, it's like my VSC year didn't happen.

But it did.
I may not feel it right this minute, but "a year of service makes a lifetime of difference." I'm going to keep blogging here for the time being, remembering experiences from St. Louis and processing what I have learned. God's will and purpose for my life still feels as mysterious as ever - what purposes for my volunteer year will I disover long after it has finished?

"To arrive where we started, and know the place for the first time." - TS Eliot, an STL native

Yesterday was our VSC Year-End Mass of Thanksgiving, a sort-of graduation from this year of service. Our names are now enrolled in the VSC alumni book, bringing us one step closer to leaving St. Louis. Former VSCs, site supervisors, and of course the Daughters of Charity were there. Nicest Boss in the World and even the NFNF CEO were there to cheer me on, so to speak. They almost did so audibly, but then decided it might be inappropriate for church. (See why my office is so much fun?)

These closing ceremonies took place in the same place as our opening Mass: the Daughters' Provincial House chapel. I love this little room in its classical simplicity. The skylight over the altar always reminds me of an impluvium in an ancient Roman atrium. Yesterday the sunlit room was full of pride, tears, and memories. Remember when we first came here? How excited and nervous we were? How we barely knew about each other? How much we had to learn about service? How long a whole year seemed?

And now, in the blink of an eye, it's almost over. We can't stay in VSC forever, and life keeps flowing on to the next stage. We only have to look to the wedding of a VSC the night before to see that Life goes on.
We also saw it in the Daughter who passed away in her sleep that same night. Sr. Mary Patrice "slipped away like she always does, like a cat," one Sister said. A petite former school principal, Patrice was an assistant and dear friend to the VSC director. It's a harsh blow to realize that we won't see her friendly face on our doorstep anymore. God willing, she's smiling up in heaven now instead, beginning her story of eternal life. Her death reminds us all of how short and precious our time on earth is.

Life goes on, and we're back where we started: the love of Jesus pressing us onward.

The Distractions of Modernity

John Quincy Adams is one of my favorite presidents. He doesn't deserve obscurity and being the runner-up Adams (although his dad is also a great American). Even though JQA's time in office wasn't astounding, he is certainly one of the most effective ex-Presidents. After leaving the White House, he served in Congress for 17 years and fought against slavery. Now there's a public servant.

The Anchoress at First Things has a great post about JQA today, musing on his intense expressions in portraits, his penchant for skinny-dipping in the Potomac (it's true), and his impatience with being under the Presidential microscope.

“I can scarcely conceive a more harassing, teasing, wearying condition of existence.” If the foibles and nattering ankle biters were that annoying 200 years ago, imagine him being president in the day of internets, blogs, “netroots”, “wingnuts” and 24-hour-always-hungry news networks.
Perhaps it is the technology of the age that has brought affability and a gift for hucksterism to the fore in politics, and rendered them supremely consequential. I wonder how the giants who formed our nation would fare, these days, hunkering down with Chris Matthews and Barbara Walters. Would Ben Franklin’s genius be undermined or enhanced by insta-media? Would John Adams be considered too crotchety, like Bob Dole? Would George Washington be considered too staid? Would Thomas Jefferson have to endure the wrath of Keith Olbermann for daring to play his violin while something was left unresolved in the nation? Would any of them get elected under the intense scrutiny of our age, wherein - as Don Surber notes here - so many are so easily scandalized?

Oh technology. So useful but so distracting. Last night when I got home the power was out on our block. For the first time, I noticed the moonlight and insect chirping that are usually drowned out by streetlights and air conditioners. Conversations by candlelight are more peaceful, too. Surrounded by the warm glow of all the random candles from the reflection room, I finished some VSC year-end paperwork and made notes on my handbell music. I couldn't help thinking that this was how Mozart, Beethoven, and even JQA did their work. Did they get more done without Facebook or 24 hour news?

Godspeed, Sr. Ros!

I usually don't post pictures of myself, but I love this one of Texas Volunteer and me with Sr. Rosalind Moss. This weekend was our first time meeting her in a while. Sadly, it was also the last since the occasion was her goodbye party. She's leaving St. Louis, too, albeit for only a year of novitiate study and training.

Expansion of the Daughters of Mary, Mother of Israel's Hope is on hold while Sr. Ros is in her novitiate. Work renovating her convent and organizing educational materials will go on, thanks to her new administrative assistant and an army of volunteers. Hopefully next summer St. Louis will again see Sr. Ros and some new sisters out and about in full habit, evangelizing the neighborhood. (And hopefully there will soon be more information on the order's website.)

We're really going to miss Sr. Ros. Even thought we've only met her a few times, she always treats us like we are the most important and wonderful people in the world. We put in a few Saturday hours helping around her convent, but went away feeling like we had received ten times what we have given. I don't know what I would have done without her comforting advice the Saturday I messed up on the GRE and was dealing with stress in the VSC community.

Where else could one find a nun with great Jewish humor? (She is a convert, after all.) After hearing my rantings, Sr. Ros turned to Texas Vol and asked "Does she believe in God? Because the way she's talking it sure sounds like she doesn't."
Then she turned back to me. "This is what you do. Go home, write a hundred times on the chalkboard 'Jesus I trust in you. Jesus I trust in you. Even if I don't feel it, Jesus I trust in you.'"

And so I will.

Vigil for Justice

Last night was a sad one for Missouri - Governor Jay Nixon approved the first state execution since 2005, ending the life of Dennis Skillicorn. Skillicorn earned the death sentence for being an accessory in a murder he did not know his friend was about to commit. What is truly tragic about this decision is that Dennis was worth more to Missouri alive than dead. Since his conviction, he turned from his "first life" of drugs and crime to a "second life" of faith and community activism. In the Potosi prison, Skillicorn organized a hospice care system for terminally-ill prisioners, created educational and visiting programs for children of inmates, and authored a book admonishing juveniles to make good choices in life. Skillicorn was a shining example of how the prison system can make rehabilitation possible, but that same system has killed off its model product.

All of us VSC girls have become concerned about the unfairness of the death penalty thanks to Pittsburgh Volunteer's work in the SVDP Criminal Justice Ministry. So, we headed to the prayer vigil happening on the steps of SLU's College Church last night.


My high school self would have thought this a hippie activity, but hey, when else can you be a hippie except when you are young and living in an convent commune. Those attending included the Jesuit Volunteers, some Daughters of Charity, and some people who indeed looked like aging hippies. But there were also people whose own lives have been impacted by the criminal justice system going awry. For instance, this man being interviewed by a reporter was recently exonerated of a false murder charge.

Current criticism of the death penalty is another example of how defending human life requires you to address social problems. Are innocent people sentenced to death? It does happen. People on death row are not necessarily the worst criminals, they just couldn't afford a lawyer good enough to finagle an easier sentence. Why isn't life in a high-security prison enough to protect the public? Do executions solve the problem of murder?

I don't think so. Skillicorn's death doesn't remove the pain of those people his friend killed, or bring back the innocent victims. I'll never forget seeing chilling news coverage of Timothy McVeigh's execution for the Oklahoma City bombing. The victim's families were still sad and still hurting. A few other people were out for vengeance, but just once death wasn't satisfying enough. "Next we need to get Terry Nichols!" one guy told the cameras. He seemed thrilled by the idea of deciding who dies.

"And so what we have learned applies to our lives today" - Veggie Tales

The VSC house has been entertaining several prospective volunteers lately. I'm excited to see next year's VSC roster slowly accumulate. I also enjoy how talking with these girls makes us reflect on our own expereinces.

Our most recent guest asked a rather random question: "Have you changed after doing a volunteer year?"
My first reaction was "Yeah, I actually hate poor people now....what do you think we'd say??"
How could we leave college, move to a new city, start full time jobs, and not change?

But seriously, how we have changed is the interesting answer. There are little ways, like my new obsession with brown rice and the fact that I have actually thought owning a dog would be fun. All of us now know tons of Vincentian Saint trivia, and some of the volunteers want to continue careers in their work now. Others, myself included, are drawn to another life calling.

In many ways, this year has paid off as I hoped. I have seen a new part of the country, lived in a city, and learned about how the poor live there. The result is a greater solidarity with and awareness of the people around me. It wasn't until I met teenage mothers, entered their homes, and drove their streets that I comprehended some of the complexity of their lives. I didn't truly appreciate my loving, nuturing parents until I saw the results of neglect and abuse. Leaving my bubble has changed me.

This change can go both ways, though. A while back some clients in NFNF's Healthy Start, a federally-funded project, got to accompany the program directors on a trip to DC. Healthy Start staff are still talking about how exciting it was to see these moms explore the new world of politics in a new city. Clients attended workshops, shook hands with congressmen, and took pictures in front of the Capitol building. They told lawmakers about the changes Healthy Start had brought to their lives, and the future changes (school, jobs,) that they hoped to make.

I hope these women and I continue to benefit from seeing the world outside our neighborhood bubble.

"The branches are green and the fields are muddy" - Easter song from my childhood

So now I can Arkansas to the list of "Places I Have Been"And I understand why they call it "God's Country." The was the view at the top of our hike.


The weather was too unpredictable for us to venture on the water like these hard-core fishermen.


So this was our posture most of the weekend. There was even cable TV! It doesn't take much to entertain you when have been "living simply" all year.


At least all that rain makes things grow.

"How far away, Little Rock, ARK." - South Pacific

Thanks to the fact that gas no longer costs $4 a gallon, the VSC has been able to save a lot of our transportation stipends this year. It's tradition for this communal surplus to go toward road trips or other fun activities.

This weekend we're using some of the slush fund to head down to Arkansas, aka "God's Country" or "The Middle of Nowhere" depending on how you view it. On of the California Volunteers' parents operate a fishing resort on two rivers there, and they are letting us use one of their cabins. VSC has a long tradition of Razorback volunteers, but I have never been to Arkansas before.

It should be a good time of VSC bonding. We had visions of lying out in the sun and canoing, but the forecast looks like this weekend will be more like Thunderstorm Fest 2009. (Free admission for kids on Sunday, $1 hot dogs, thrilling monster truck show!) I'm bringing 3 books just in case things get super-soggy and we stay cooped-up.

Oh dear, is it really time for this?

It's annoying to say, but time really is flying by. April is practically over, and that means we have only about 2 months left in our VSC year! Volunteers for next year are already lining up. We current volunteers are realizing that we will soon, even though the weather is growing more beautiful and being outdoors in St. Louis is becoming more fun everyday.

Since the calendar is rapidly swallowing my free weekends, I need to make a list of "must do"St. Louis things before I leave. So far I have already seen/done

• The Arch
• Anheuser Busch Factory Tour
• Missouri History Museum
• St. Louis Art Museum
• City Museum
• Old St. Louis Cathedral
  
• Ted Drewes' frozen custard
• Italian food at Ragazzi's on The Hill
• cheap happy hour food in the Central West End
• many, many meals in The Loop (Fitz's, Blueberry Hill, etc. etc.)
  
• Cardinals game in Busch Stadium
• Blues game in the Scottrade Center
  
• Walking through Forest Park
• Kickball League in Tower Grove Park

But I still should get to:

• Botanical Gardens
• Forest Park Zoo
• Science Center
• paddle boats in Forest Park
• outdoor theater at the Muny
• movies at the Moolah, Tivoli
  
• Soulard Farmers Market
  
• Bellefontaine Cemetery
  
• "The Rock" Church/ 2 hour Gospel music Mass
• St. Francis Xavier/SLU College Church
• that log cabin church in Cahokia Texas Volunteer wants to visit
• actually doing good photo shoots of the Cathedral and local parishes now that I have my tripod in town

Not. Enough. Time. To be. A good. St. Louisan.
(Although really, the only way to become a true St. Louisan is to grow up in your grandparents' house here and then attend a notable high school.)

"Give me your arms for the brokenhearted"-Brandon Heath

In the VSC house we have dinner and prayer as a group 3 times a week. Tonight New York Volunteer was in charge of prayer, and did a great job as always. You can always tell her teaching background by the handouts and visual aids she prepares. She started with this song by Brandon Heath, which gets stuck in your head and urges you to share God's compassion.

Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
Ones that are far beyond my reach.
Give me your heart for the ones forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see.

I once wished I had's God's ability to constantly be present with and know the heart of every person. I'd be so good at staying in touch with all my friends then! Really, this isn't practical for us mere humans. We can't internalize everyone's life story or we'd explode. The trick is to recognize God in the people we meet, if only for the second that they cross our paths.

This idea happens everyday at my job. Maybe it's becuase the Nicest Boss in the World is constantly affirming other people, and it's rubbing off on me. Maybe it's because we try to thank visitors like every donation is the best one ever. Whatever the reason, I love learning the stories of the people who stop by NFNF.

This morning Nicest Boss in the World and I helped two elderly women unload bags of baby clothes from their van. We offered a tour, and one woman asked if her service dog could come. Of course he could! So we welcomed a furry visitor wearing a "Don't Pet Me - I'm Working" vest. He had been abandoned, but some kind soul trained him to offer balance and protection to his fragile new owner.

Later in the day our Development Director walked up cradling a napping baby girl. This precious infant had come with her foster mom, who raises the girl's 7 year old brother and her own 6 year old son besides. I can't imagine taking in additional children only to let them go in a few months, but it's such an important job. The foster mom is white and the baby is African-American, but that's not really important. What is special is that the foster mom's son is learning to welcome and care for vulnerable people, if only for a brief moment.

Happy Easter!

The VSC House is so full of Easter candy and cupcakes you might get diabetes walking in the door. There's also leftover ham, potato casserole, and fruit salad. Not to mention my GF chocolate cake with jelly bean Empty Tomb. It's been a fun, relaxing Easter Sunday. Two of the girls had family come into town, so we had quite the full house for brunch. We gave each other "Secret Bunny" baskets of goodies. The Easter Bunny (aka Texas Volunteer) even hid eggs full of jelly beans and confetti poppers around the house. Now we're crashed on the couches, uploading and tagging Facebook pictures of the day.

This has been a lovely, and at times lonely, Triduum. Last year I practically lived in the Catholic Campus Ministry chapel during Holy Week. I always had a crowd of friends around to pray, laugh, sing, and eat with. This year the VSC girls have done some services together, but last night I went to the Vigil Mass alone. I missed my family too, who were all pumped up to see Little Brother #2 serve at "the Mother of All Vigils" (MOAV) back in Virginia.

Two Daughters of Charity were at my Vigil, though, and they insisted on driving me the 50 feet to my house after Mass. It was 10pm after all :-) The Vigil is inherently beautiful - you can't not get goosebumps from blessing sacred fire and hearing the Exultet sung. The ritual can overcome musical ridiculousness, like the tambourine-accompanied musical number the choir director tried to create out of Moses parting the Red Sea. The same guy chose Mozart's Ave Verum Corpus for the communion hymn. I think he is seriously confused.

Mass at the Cathedral this morning, on the other hand, was blissfully magnificent. I was alone again, naturally, but it was worth it. I played in some abridged bell pieces, and just generally enjoyed being part of the choir but not actually having to sing like a professional. Of course the "Christus Vincit" and Hallelujah Chorus nearly reduced me to tears. This Mass was bittersweet, since it might very well be my last playing bells. I hate to leave just when I am finally a good ringer and recognized as part of the group. The "boys club" of lower register bells seems to accept me. Karen, our director, said I am a great ringer. The sacristan even knows I need a low-gluten communion host saved! Dear Pope Benedict, please assign STL an archbishop ASAP so I can play in his installation Mass. Thanks.

Pop-top champagne and other fine dining adventures.

Everyone else was on a date or out of town tonight, so Jessica and I teamed up in search of dinner out. We finally chose Sasha's on Shaw, a cozy new wine bar in the neighborhood where her Covenant House kids clean streets. (They apparently call it "bar in the 'hood")

I loved the decor - green armchairs around granite-topped tables, blond wood floors, and light bulbs dangling inside old wine bottles. Our waiter was cute but distracted, though, and the portions were far too small. Trout salad with pine nuts, lemon zest, balsamic vinegar, and olive oil sounds delicious, doesn't it? Too bad it only covered a smallish plate. Jessica's two crabcakes were simply that, with a few onion bits sprinkled on. We were so hungry afterwards, we drove through Jack-In-The-Box for some greasy carb sustenance.

BUT our meal also included one of the coolest food discoveries in ages - sparkling wine in a can! Francis Ford Coppola produces the stuff, which is named for his daughter Sofia. It's bubbly, sparkling, and tasty, whether poured into a glass or sipped through the bendy straw (yes, bendy straw) that comes with it. Brilliant.

A Visa to Steelers Nation

When you share a house with someone from Pittsburgh, it is inevitable that the Steelers become a prominent part of your life. Thus, Sunday night involved lots of cheering, Terrible Towel waving, and victory lap running around the church parking lot next door. Pittsburgh's going to the Suuuu-per Bowl!

I suppose this makes me a bandwagon fan. I'd rather call it continuing education in American sports culture. Also, I have a right to be proud of head coach Mike Tomlin since he is a WM alum and was my commencement speaker, after all. He might seem an unlikely Tribe member since our football is not exactly legendary. At yesterday's press conference, though, he proved that The College made its mark on him.

"... I just told that group, 'We've got miles to do before we sleep,' " Tomlin said.
"I'm no Robert Frost," he added sheepishly.

See? Like any true William and Mary person, he footnotes his literature references. Now that's Tribe Pride!

We love free stuff!

I just finished a phone conversation with a woman in New Jersey who saw NFNF founder Sharon Rohrbach on CBS a few months back. This lady has a preemie infant in her family, and was touched by our efforts to help medically fragile babies. And so, she is shipping us several boxes of new and barely worn outgrown preemie clothes!

Every now and then, we volunteers get some great free stuff as well. Kristina brings home piles of extra bread from the shelter where she works. Emma's school sends her grocery gift cards every month. Target gift cards from a generous VSC board member were happy surprises in our Christmas stockings. its encouraging to see that when you are generous with your time and yourself, other people will be generous to you.

A fun recent windfall came with Jessica as she finally returned from Texas. Her luggage was bursting with random stuff from her mom, including tons of Mary Kay products in discontinued packaging! We spent a good hour sorting dozens of little hot pink boxes, smearing lipstick shade testers on the backs of our hands. The deep bronze foundation and dark blushers will go to Covenant House, where Jessica's teen girls should be able to get good use out of them. As for me, I probably won't buy eyeshadow or lipstick for another 2 years, given how seldom I actually apply it. I'll probably finish it off around the same time NFNF opens the last box of prescription-advertising post-it notes and anti-bacterial soap that recently were donated by the truckload.

We even have a guest room!

It's hard to believe we are almost halfway through the VSC year. I'm running out of time to see everything I want to see - and for people to come visit me! Yeah, I know, travel is expensive and everyone else is busy too. Let's see what The Onion has to say about dropping by the STL

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

There are turkey-eating festivities in the VSC house today, thanks to two heaping boxes of produce and canned goods one of the girls brought home from work. A couple volunteers' families came in for the occasion, and Sr. Rosalind accepted our dinner invite at the last minute. Jessica called me in a panic this morning for advice on GF/dairy free Thanksgiving cuisine for our favorite nun. Smart girls, she and Kristina had already thought to use my GF baking mix instead of flour to coat the bird's oven bag. I told them to raid my dairy-free margerine in the freezer and to heat up some green beans sans mushroom soup.

I'm a little sad to miss Sr. Ros' first visit to our home, but I happily trade it for quality time with my many relatives in Chicago. The Windy City has always held a sort of Motherland mystique for me, since my parents grew up here and most of their families remain in the area. How appropriate, since Thanksgiving is a holiday to celebrate heritage, no matter how selective or mythical that shared national memory may be. (The first Thanksgiving was technically in Virginia, but whatever. Construction paper Pilgrim hats are still fun.)

Being in Chicago reminds me that I'm part of a larger family tradition. Aunts marvel over how I resemble my father. My cousins observe that I twirl my hair just like them. My Grandmum chats for hours over the kitchen table, and suddenly I realize where my mom got that habit. Tomorrow we're going to make Grandma Cookies, the secret, labor intensive biscotti recipe from a distant Italian matriarch in my dad's family. I was glad that my own Grandma waxed nostalgic about our immigrant forbears over dinner. Little cousin Greg got squirmy, but maybe one day he'll appreciate the rare chance to hear how we got to sit here in a comfy suburb pigging out on sweet potatoes and turkey gravy. Those milk-delivering Italians and garment sewing Russian Jews would be pleased to see that their descendants have college educations and pumpkin pie readily available.